Late to bed, late to rise, makes a man a vampire . . .

My vampiric tendencies are starting to annoy me as of late.  Why just the other day . . . night . . . morning, I was on this very computer and noticed a comment from a friend on the MySpace.  "Why," I thought to myself, "would he be commenting at this hour?  It must be pretty late in these parts and, as this friend of mine resides in a timezone 2 hours more mature than my own, it seems ridiculous that anyone there should be commenting at this time."  Then, I realized that is was 6am where I was . . . making it 8am there . . . which, I am told is a normal time for one to be up.  Then I thought, "I really think in crazy run-on sentences at this late . . . early hour."

An Affinity for Infinity

Mathematicians are playas. They'll roll right up on yo function and be all like "Yo Effavex, why don't you climb up into my ti-89."  And yo function will usually put out--some real number.  They won't stick with that same function either, cuz they'll derive it crazy.

When I was 18, like most 18 year-olds, I was insecure. Most of my responses to people included the words "I know."  Here's a hint, If most of your responses to people include the words "I know," then you probably aren't letting yourself learn anything and therefore don't know.  At an older age I have learned to suck up my pride.  Sure I am smart, but that means I am smart enough to abuse the resources afforded me.  At 18 I was dumb enough to think I was smart enough to not need those resources. 

So, maybe I understand my analysis class better than most, and maybe I am better at proof writing.  This doesn't change the fact that I suck at arithmetic and sometimes need a reminder that 1/X is greater than X where X<1 (Oh David, you mathematical moron, you).  There is no learning in pretense.  Although there is, and I know there is because I have got it, pretense in learning. 

Even the biggest players need a wing-man from time to time.  For this reason I'm starting a study group for my analysis class. Oh the white boards we will fill to a montage that will result in slow-mo high-fives . . .  I can't wait.

 

crap!  I got a-sub-n all over this shirt, I should change.

Second Place is the First Loser

As Wini and I were discussing the other day . . . We teach our children "slow and steady wins the race."  Really?  Doesn't fast and steady beat slow and steady, and therefore will win any race more so than slow and steady?  In fact, I bet you any hare could beat any tortoise and still afford a nap, so long as that nap wasn't too long.  So, fast and fairly steady will beat slow and steady; and, while it may not win every race as fast and steady will, it may just win enough races to allow early retirement from fictitious racing.  This is that which I am thinking.

On friday I had my first quiz in ordinary differential equations.  I was nervous while approaching this quiz for several reasons.  First, my ODE professor does not seem to wanted to teach.  This coupled with the fact that it is very difficult to understand him through his accent, left me very much untaught.  Secondly, I had not done any homework sets covering that material which I had not learned, which was all of it.

A couple of my classmates, however, seemed on top of things.  They had been reading the text ahead of time, the did homework sets, and they consulted their Schaum's early and often.  Sure I had been reading (Sherlock Holmes), solving problems (like how to fill ones tea kettle despite a very full sink), and consulting my Schaum's (actually Lisa's Schaum's . . . on tensor calculus); but I felt a bit behind.  Was I doing something wrong?  Was I not being a good steward of my time?  Probably.  Here is what I realized:  I am a hare, not a tortoise.  I rock the naps and then have to run very fast late in the game, but it works for me.

By the way, it turns out that the quiz was more or less a joke.  I think my professor only gave it because he had to and therefore made it ridiculously easy so that he wouldn't have to waste his time grading anything.

"Пожалуйста напишите ваше имя на этом списке когда вы будете сделаны викторине, так, что я знаю кто приняло ее. Если я случаюсь освободить все викторины, то я угадываю что я должно дать вам все A' s ;)" or something like that.  As I said, he is difficult to understand.

 

Next up: The Chapter Chair, the Bed, and the Bathtub battle it out to see who is the best location for a nap.

uMac iDon't

I have been busy with school and have, because of this, neglected my blog.  My apologies go out to all three of you, my avid readers.  The truth is, I have had nothing about which to blog, that is, until now. 

I have been made aware of Apple's new shiny thing, you know, the one that is named as if it is some sort of high-tech feminine product.  I look at my old trusty PDA.  It is funny, a few years ago a couple of the kids I strength coached made fun of the fact that I had a separate PDA and phone.  It was too old school for them.  After all, my clie at that point was about 2 years old.  To convert from real years into tech years, I am told you have to use this complicated formula:  Ytech = Yreal x 1googolplex. 

This ridiculous age of my technical device was reflected by its features.  After all, my clie only can connect to any wireless network to surf the web, act an mp3 player, download new applications, read e-books, take photos, has graffiti for super-fast writing (in proper text form), keeps a schedule, and feeds small children.  Those middle-schoolers were on to something those 3 years ago.  In this day and age, who really surfs the internet, keeps a schedule, or listens to portable music?

Now there is all this talk about this iPad.  It pretty much has the same functionality of my old clie, but with the panache of  a celebrity on the red carpet.  Suddenly a device separate from one's phone is back in vogue, except only when that device is far more bulky and has an irritating interface.  Steve Jobs, you have once again earned your paycheck--selling overpriced shiny things to the masses, while making them think they are part of some sort of fringe movement.  My hat goes off to you.

I still use my clie.  It does everything one would need in a portable device, even if it isn't over-priced enough for the mass consumer. 

I sweat alone. Yeah, with nobody else.

The Lory apartments, where I am a resident, consist of two buildings--Lory north and Lory south.  These two buildings are said to house over 100 students.  Why, then, is it the case that the 3 times that I have used the sauna in the basement of Lory north I have not come across 1 person?  Is it because I am the king of the sauna?  I'd like to think this is the case.

Still, 3 sauna visits, at 30 minutes per visit, equals 1.5 hours down there.  You would think I would come across one of those 100 people.  As I have not, I have come to the conclusion that not one Finnish person lives in the Lory apartments.  This means two things: One, I will not get to impress anyone with my ability to say "Santa-Clause" in Finnish; and, two, I am indeed king of the Lory sauna.

Long live the king.

Snowshoe 2-3-4 and Ski 2-3-4. Good.

 

It's not easy being the obstreperous one

An abridged list of places where Dave has gotten free food since moving:

1) An aerobics room on campus -- There was a burrito welcome dinner for new and transfer students.

2) A church -- I got a loaf of bread for attending a church for the first time.

3) Chipotle -- Went in looking for coffee, left with a free burrito. 

4) The International House -- Tacos were served during this "fiesta" thrown for those residents of the Lory apartments (where I live) and of the International House (where international students live).

I realize that I have spent most nights sitting in the chapter chair, sipping wine from my rocks glass, reading . . . alone.  I look back at my posts.  Most of them rave about avocados -- friggin' avocados!  Who blogs about avocados?  People who spend most nights sitting in a chapter chair, sipping wine from their rocks glass, reading alone, that's who! Realizing this, I have attended a few events in the hope of meeting people.

First, I attended a dinner welcoming new and transfer students.  At this event I had the pleasure of sitting across from a kid who liked to concatenate ". . . that reminds me of this time that I was at a strip club . . ." to my table's conversation.  To be honest, it seemed to me that his apparent age would not have allowed him to have any strip club stories.  Perhaps he confused his pediatrician's office for a strip club.  Needless to say, I left that event prematurely or, rather, maturely.

I also attended a church for the first time (since the move).  The problem with me and churches is my judgmental, 14 years of Christian education enabled, learned pretense.  There was a battle in my head that went something like this:

Me: "Ugh, topical preaching?  Really?  What, are we in 3rd grade Sunday school again?"
 

I: "C'mon, they seem to be a good Bible believing church.  Give it a chance, so the pastor hasn't learned the power of good exegetical preaching yet."
 

Me: ". . . and white bread? Wouldn't Jesus want this temple to only ingest whole wheat?"
 

I: "OK Me, now that is just petty."

 

 I then attended CSU's "CRU" meeting.  Afterward everyone went to Coldstone Creamery.  Despite the fact that I try to not eat added sugar, I went in the hope of meeting people or, at minimum, a person.  To not be left out in the consumption part of this ice-cream fellowship, I went next door to Chipotle, praying that they had coffee.  When I came back to Coldstone with my free burrito, I realized how old I was compared to everyone else there. While I will most likely attend "CRU" again, the cause for future deep conversion will probably be lost.

Finally (tonight), I went to an event for apartment residents.  In line for food I met Ahmad.  While still in line he indicated that he would be my friend.  I tried to not get too excited, this was my best lead to date.  I sat with him to eat.  It just so happens that he was sitting across from a group of Christians -- Christians who apparently go to a church with exegetical preaching; Christians who invited me to go see "The Book of Eli" with them (yes, Mike, two movies in the same year!); Christians who would later come to my apartment and finally use all those coasters I lovingly made from old CDs and cardboard.  While Ahmad may be Muslim, he was totally used by Jesus.  Sorry Ahmad.

We all sat around my underused coffee table and sipped wine from rocks glasses and coffee mugs.  We even shared a couple of avocados!  (OK, so I even blog about avocados now that I have met people.  We all know that I have some serious problems.)

Wait, now I remember why I don't want friends . . . 

Ugh, do I really have to go out tomorrow for more wine and avocados?